COSMIC HORROR • SCIENCE FICTION • DARK COMEDY

CJ Maylock writes through the rift.

When nonsense is the only thing that makes sense.

Strange classrooms. Impossible universes. Haunted lesson plans. Stories about ordinary people trying to hold themselves together while reality spectacularly fails around them.

PUBLICATION STATUS COMING SOON FROM RED FERN PRESS
Comparative Essay

The symbolism in this novel clearly represents...

This sentence was definitely not generated by AI.
Lesson Plans

Monday: Close interdimensional rift.

Tuesday: Vocabulary quiz.
Remember:
copies, coffee, cosmic emergency
RIFT STABILITY: QUESTIONABLE
FACULTY MORALE: LOWER
LESSON PLANS: STILL DUE
Today’s Objective:
Survive until dismissal.

ROOM 214 // NORMAL OPERATIONS HAVE BEEN SUSPENDED

A NOVEL

The English
Department
vs. Chaos
and Nonsense

CJ MAYLOCK

Official cover coming soon →

The English Department
vs. Chaos and Nonsense

Sage Lyken is a high school English teacher who thought the worst part of her day was grading essays that were clearly written by AI. That changes when interdimensional rifts begin opening around the school.

With the help of her two coworkers, Sage must close the rifts, protect her students, uncover what is happening, and somehow still have her lesson plans submitted by Monday morning.

Cosmic Horror Science Fiction Fantasy Teacher Comedy Mystery Sapphic Romance

The ordinary collides with the impossible.

CJ Maylock is an Ohio author and educator who writes stories where the ordinary collides with the impossible.

Inspired by classrooms, cosmic horror, science fiction, and absurd humor, her work explores friendship, identity, and what it means to keep going when the universe itself seems determined to fall apart.

When she is not writing, CJ teaches students with autism, creates YouTube videos, and laughs at videos of basset hounds.

“When nonsense is the only thing that makes sense.”
Author CJ Maylock
FILE: CJ_MAYLOCK.AUTHOR
LOCATION Ohio
OCCUPATION Author and educator
WRITES Science fiction, cosmic horror, comedy, and sapphic stories
KNOWN DISTRACTION Basset hound videos

Survive until dismissal.

Collect useful teaching supplies. Avoid cosmic nonsense. The district has not approved additional planning time.

How to Play

Objects will appear around the classroom. Click the useful teacher items to earn points. Do not click the rifts, cursed paperwork, or suspicious AI essays.

Coffee restores approximately three minutes of hope.
🖊️ Red pens maintain the illusion of academic control.
📚 Books are generally safer than interdimensional portals.
🌀 Clicking a rift is discouraged by the employee handbook.
Today’s Objective:
Make it to dismissal without ending reality.
SCORE 0
ROUND 0 / 10
FACULTY MORALE STABLE
🏫

Mandatory Faculty Training

The English Department is experiencing a minor cosmic emergency. Collect the supplies you need and avoid anything that threatens reality—or requires another meeting.

🎉

Dismissal Achieved

Contact CJ before reality closes again.

For interviews, events, publication inquiries, media requests, or other professional communication.

cjmaylock@gmail.com ↗
INBOX STATUS: OPEN
RIFT STATUS: MOSTLY CLOSED
EMAIL RESPONSE: PROBABLY FASTER THAN DISTRICT IT